The Best of Sardonic Maha: Recapping the H50h Pilot

Editorial Note

This is a tribute to the genius of Prettteee Maha, the FUCUP founder, whose H50 sardonic recaps made us. It’s a nostalgic reminder of how both H50 and the FUCUPs began. Below are the best lines from Maha’s H50 pilot recap, slightly edited and enhanced by pics. Find the full original text here. Thank you, Maha. Cause this is ultimately all about you. *hugsies*

{Screencaps courtesy of Book ’em Danno.}


Maha: McGarrett blue steels while flaring his nostrils and I touch my forehead thinking how if he’s not careful, he will develop some very bad frown lines.

Me: Introducing McFrown and eyes.xing. You’ll never forget your first time.

Eyes.xed into submission. Also: REM.


Maha: McGarrett requests a medium [tee] and the set crew responds with a resounding “Huh?” as I begin a petition to The Head of the English Language requesting we render illegal the use of words “medium” and “Alex O’Loughlin” together in any capacity.

Me: While I begin a petition demanding that physically beautiful men be banned from wearing loose clothes. Or any clothes, for that matter.

Stealth mode.


Maha: McGarrett and Denno are out in the backyard and McGarrett is putting on a new shirt.  Let me clarify: McGarrett is shirtless while Denno is still in his tie. What?  How did this happen and why is this a part of the storyline?  Also, why the fck am I complaining?

Me: Shhh! Let’s just stare at the pretty.

For plot purposes.


Maha: Honestly, I don’t condone violence, but even I want to punch Mullet Man [Sang Min] repeatedly.  Not because he’s a human trafficker, which I can get over, but because he’s doing some weird snaky motion in the chair and I am getting seasick.

Me: Introducing the sneaky snake Sand Man.

A sea serpent wriggling its tail (mullets) and making me seasick.


Maha: McGarrett walks in with a sling and a whole lot of excellent bruise make-up.  I nod at my own sickness because I think bruises, cuts, scrapes and scars are devastatingly welcome on a man.

Me: Introducing BTTF. Aka McG-Spot in need of a hug. From my thighs.

S.x Boot Camp McG styles may get rough.


Maha: Chin says he has an idea for a name and then starts speaking Swahili again.  It translates to “No task is too big when done together”.  Please note that if Chin were playing the role of McGarrett, this show would have been called Hawaii NTITBWDT.

Me: Chin has been clearly drinking.

Cheers to Hawaii NTITBWDT!!

Editorial Sidenote

{I never had the chance to exchange comments with the FUCUP queen for real. As per uge, I came too late to it. But: have you noticed how cleverly I entered into convo with Maha above? The sm@rt b@stard th@t I @m. Heh. My at-key just exploded. Body count: 1.}


6 thoughts on “The Best of Sardonic Maha: Recapping the H50h Pilot

  1. I love all the pics and comments, I’m still giggling at the “sea serpent”, you just have to love SangMing, he’s so real with his VincentVega-Style! I’m so in love with #1 eyebrow-porn, ’cause I’m a pathetic eyebrow-perv, and I’m proud 😉 ! His face when he pulls over the teeshirt, hilarious, thanks!
    And the Victor-Hess-battered-face-style, so frkn hot and phenomenally sexy, the end scene was, omg is it rude to call someone sexy when he’s been beaten like that, sorry 😉 ! And isn’t he wearing a greyteeshirt, aren’t you the one obsessed with that Color 😉 ?


    1. Glad you enjoy this! And even more glad that I’m not the only who loves Sang Min! Such an adorkable character – and he goes on to develop from a simple baddie to a more complex character, which is a nice feature in Show.

      RE: Eyebrow p.rn – I never saw a person with such mobile eyebrows and wouldn’t think this eyebrow acrobacy was even physically possible. But clearly it is… And yeah, #Perv(P)ride!

      Whaaat? Me obsessed with grey? Oh, I might have mentioned *cough* once or twice *cough* that I quite liiike the colour *cough*… OK, you got me, and I say #PervPride again.


    1. Maha is the genius, of course, so my stealing her ideas may make me appear smart. Actually, her new 3.23 recap make me literally speechless, so I’m likely to stick to conversing with Mama my model only in my vivid imagination still for a while.


The FUCUPs that perv together stay together. Let’s!

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