H50h 4.09 All-in-One Recap/Picspam: LOL and Boo and WTF [Part 2]

Whatsup? Read Part One here. Steve gets intel that a family member was arrested and before he can yell I hate you, Mary! he learns that the culprit is auntie. Did she kill the butcher? (He totally deserved it.) Nope, she was buying some blue crystal meth on the street. Or was it – oh, it was just some pot that she was getting and the problem is that her pass for medical marihuana isn’t valid in Hawaii. What? Oh my God, auntie is in the terminal cancer stage and she came to say bye bye to the McGarrett kids that she brought up. Auntie rubs Steve’s back and he purrs and cries. (Me nearly too, though I have a heart of ice.) Auntie wants to get booked by a cute cop (Steve?) and so it be.

The guy on whom the dead SS guy was doing the background check is one Dante (or something close), a hired gun. He is connected to one Rafael (or something close), a professional cleaner (I’m calling right now to book him for a Christmas cleaning job). The crime jargon confuses me, but I conclude that Rafael is now the chief suspect. My conclusion proves correct, for SWAT and H50hs storm Rafael’s house. Chiant gives Rafael a nasty booboo and Steve gives him an evil eye and a tongue. (What a Christmas!) Steve also threatens to give him a taste of his own lye, literally, unless he cooperates and gives them something in return.

Auntie is picked up from jail by Cat and because she’s a sturdy and stubborn lady, she now wants to be taken someplace nice. (Steve’s bedroom?) That would be Cat’s choice but it would be a bit awkward, so Cat takes auntie to the second best place in the island. It’s a rather pretty beach shaded by trees. They have a girl bonding moment and Cat promises to make sure that Steve and Mary stick together. (Even if she should use nail glue for it.) Danno and Steve meanwhile have their boy bonding moment. It consists of prolonged silence punctuated by occasional heavy sighs and exchange of troubled looks. Then they’re done and crack some beers.

Back to the case. Where the useless coppers are thinking that the president is in danger, the smart H50hs figure out that the target is the landlady’s good good daughter. I suspected her straight away! Except she’s not the perp but the vic, but whatever. She’s targeted because Rafael is one mean guy and also because she’s a protected witness (or something close). Coming home from shopping with her mother, the target glimpses her assassin and off they all run in the forest. A woman-hunt ensues and ends at the beach, where the target is hurt but she’ll be ok because Chinchin saved her a$$ in red hot pants by shooting the assassin with his big big gun.

The Five-Ohs are to meet the president at the airport for no apparent reason, but as long as Show puts them all in nice suits for the occasion, I approve. Poor Danno is the only one of the set who hasn’t met the president yet and he looks like he’s about to faint. The president isn’t really coming for holiday but for secret negotiations with his North Korean counterpart. (Seriously? North Koreans don’t negotiate with capitalists!) Also, the president is a Hawaiian native. I somehow can’t visualise it. When my suspense reaches its peak and a silhouette appears in the door of the plane, there’s a cut to another scene. Boo. I wanted to see the president too!

The ohana gathers for the thanksgiving dinner. (Minus the dinner, unless you take your turkey raw.) Cat is wearing a normal dress! Mary is wearing auntie’s dress. Steve finds Mary, who just learned the news from auntie, crying on the porch. He joins her, hugs her and looks like he’s sitting on a hedgehog. The dinner is actually taking place in a diner. There’s a singing person on the stage. Joan is not getting it, Grace is bored and Mary is scared. Everyone is relieved as the singer gives the floor to auntie, who sings to give everyone something nice to remember her by. Mary and Steve hug again (Steve already disposed of the hedgehog) and I think I’ll weep. Done.


The FUCUPs that perv together stay together. Let’s!

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